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Leaf and Steel

motherhood - growth - living

I Hate Mother’s Day

May 6, 2022

I just do. This is my second one. It’s not for me, I’m sorry. I hate Mother’s Day.

Let me be clear that I have a great relationship with my mother, as well as my mother-in-law. I am a mother.

And now, I absolutely can’t stand Mother’s Day.

I’ve had a handful of moments of “oh, wow, I really am a mom now”.

Here are some that stick out to me:

  • Viewing the idea of a new pet as “just another thing for me to clean up after”
  • Bones I didn’t even know I had creaking when I walk
  • Premature forehead wrinkles
  • Premature grey hair
  • Spastically hitting the OFF button on the radio when a song said the word “sex” when my daughter was in the car

You know the deal.

You know how I really know I’m a mom?

I just want to be left alone on Mother’s Day.

I want to kiss my daughter and my husband goodbye and check into a hotel with my laptop and a book and Chipotle. I don’t want to have to walk the dog or put on real clothes or answer to anyone.

What I want the most for Mother’s Day is to be completely absolved of my responsibilities.

The more I’m here on earth the more I’m realizing that the core principle, the central theme of motherhood has always been and will always be, sacrifice.

New, tangible examples of this reveal themselves to me as time goes on.

I know that there are people who don’t have their moms, people with shitty moms, people longing to be moms or moms who wish that they could spend the day with their kids who aren’t here anymore. I acknowledge that I’m coming from a place of entitled privilege. I am deeply lucky.

So, cheers to the alternate universe version of me thats sitting on a beach somewhere, reading and writing and thinking about something other than meal plans and shopping lists and stewing in self-pity.

I’m not sure how to end this post. Maybe I’ll feel differently next year.

O.


If you are interested in guest posting on Leaf and Steel, please check out our Guest Post page for guidelines!

Filed in: Uncategorized • by Olivia • 22 Comments

Moms in May

May 4, 2022

Today’s post is a guest post by Sheenia Denae. Find her on Instagram or on her website!

We are always accepting guest posts on Leaf and Steel. You can find more information on submitting your post here.


The birds are chirping, the flowers are budding, and the wind is blowing at just the right speed! As nature prepares itself for summer, I think of all the fun things that are underway. Family vacations, backyard barbecues, and picnic lunches are just around the corner!

But there’s something else I love about May. Something that makes me look forward to this month more than all the others. This is the time of year when we’re celebrated for being moms!

I look forward to that special day where I’m pampered with gifts, showered with balloons, and recognized for my hard work and efforts toward raising my little munchkin! But as sweet as it is to be celebrated by others, I mostly look forward to the opportunities to celebrate myself.

As moms, we know that every day is Mother’s Day! That is why prioritizing our self-care is essential.

In this article, we will highlight a few ways for us to sneak in a little fun and add a little spice to our lives throughout the month of May!

Take a Class

The beautiful weather and pleasant temperatures this month brings makes it a perfect time for taking indoor or outdoor classes that spark our interest.

If you enjoy painting, cooking, or arranging flowers in your spare time, taking a class could be a great way to perfect your craft in either of those areas.

If you want to explore something totally new, on the other hand, such as music, dancing, or flying… taking a class could be a great way to change things up in your life.

Here’s a short list of just a few perks you can gain by taking a class:

  • Mental relaxation
  • Fun and enjoyment
  • Learning a new skill
  • Connecting with other great people

I’m not sure about you, but I was SOLD at “mental relaxation.” So think about it!  If anything piques your interest that you haven’t had the chance to explore… now is the time!

Whatever direction you decide to take, taking a class would be a great way to carve out some quality time for yourself!

Dress to Impress

There’s an old saying that goes, “When we look good, we feel good.”

When was the last time you dressed up and felt good about yourself?  I mean really good!

As moms, we tend to get so busy prioritizing everyone else’s needs that we neglect ourselves at times… especially when it comes to our wardrobes.

May presents the perfect time for us to ditch the yoga pants and sweatshirts, and pull out those gorgeous sundresses that we haven’t worn in a while.

Dressing up has been proven to increase energy and confidence, encourage creative thinking, and foster self-expression… which all sounds like self-care to me!

So for the month of May, try giving your sweatpants and t-shirts a break. They deserve it!

Explore the Great Outdoors

We can’t celebrate Moms in May without honoring the mother of all mothers… Our beautiful Mother Nature is a sight to behold!

Since we spend so much of our time indoors (cooking, cleaning, and tending to household tasks), May is a great time for us to commit to more outdoor activities.

If you’ve been looking for new ways to keep your Vitamin D levels up, here’s a list of some fun activities you can enjoy.

  • Biking
  • Hiking
  • Horseback riding
  • Bird watching
  • Outdoor photography

The way you connect with nature doesn’t have to be fancy or complicated. A simple morning walk can help clear your mind, increase your energy, and make you feel better throughout your day.

Take a minute to think about the ways you’d like to explore, and let the May adventures begin!


I’m a devoted wife, girl mom, and educator turned homemaker.  After teaching for over 11 years, I decided to care for my family full time.  I’m now a part time freelance writer, creating blog posts and articles for businesses and individuals in my spare time.  My hobbies include cooking, reading recipes, and hiking with my family.

Find me on Instagram @made_to_be_marvelous or check out my website at sheeniadenae.wixsite.com/iwrite/

Lets Connect!


Thank you Sheenia for guest posting!

What did you think of the post?

Let us know below!

O.

More from Leaf and Steel:
  • Mother’s Day Guide for the Tired Mama in Your Life
  • How I Get Over Writer’s Block
  • Lessons from Stay-at-Home Moms
  • Guest Post: How to Be a More Self-Confident Mother and Enhance Your Life
  • Guest Post: Keeping the Focus on You

Filed in: Guest Posts, Uncategorized • by Olivia • 1 Comment

April in Review

May 2, 2022

April was a blur!

Raising a Vizsla puppy has taken my full attention this month. If you plan on getting a puppy, take note; they are a lot or work. I did a great deal of research and was still shocked by how much training, attention, and patience my little guy needs.

That being said, he is absolutely adorable and is definitely going to grow into a great dog. He’s gorgeous and very funny.

Anyways, that’s kind of taken the focus this month. We were all in survival mode. It’s been difficult to keep the dog and baby separated so that they don’t hurt each other.

I keep reminding myself that this is all temporary!

Here’s the not-so-great and the good from April.

The Not-So-Great

The dog. The dog, the dog, the dog. He’s so much sometimes. I write this covered in bruises and scratches and bumps. All typical puppy stuff.

Wakeup times. For the second month I have failed to wake up when I want to. I always set my alarm for 6 but find myself hitting snooze. Maybe next month!

The Good

I survived. That’s about all I can put here. I survived my crazy pup biting and jumping and growing too fast for me to keep up.

Outdoor time. The weather turns beautiful on Long Island this time of year. That means we’ve been getting outside as much as possible. I love watching the yard turn lush and full with green. Baby M has been having a blast in her baby jogger.


How was your April?

Did you do anything fun or learn anything new?

Let me know below!

O.

More from Leaf and Steel:
  • How to Take Care of Your Baby When You’re Sick
  • The Best Butterfly Books for Babies
  • 7 Things I Do Every Day as a Stay at Home Mom
  • How to Create a Home Learning Corner for Your One-Year-Old

Filed in: Uncategorized • by Olivia • Leave a Comment

How Much Does it Cost to Raise a Puppy? (In the First Month)

April 29, 2022

Have you ever wondered how much owning a puppy costs in the first month? I had no idea how much we would end up paying for all my pup needed early on. I went through all my vet receipts, Amazon invoices and Chewy statements to show you how much it really costs to raise a dog in the first month.

vizsla puppy 8 weeks

This post may contain affiliate links. This means that I may make a small commission off of products that are purchased through these links, at no cost to you. You can read more about this process here.

We spent a total of $2,742.96 on our dog in one month.

We have a beautiful male Vizsla named Bodhi. You can read more on why we chose a Vizsla as our family dog here. He’s the best dog for our family. Although he nips like crazy, he’s on his way to becoming an amazing dog!

I wrote this post because this was a question I had looked up and never really found a detailed answer for. I like to know how much to set aside for big expenses. I’m a stickler for “paying the best price” and comparing costs. I did a lot of back-and-forth between Petco, Chewy, and Amazon to find the best prices.

It was no surprise that online shopping is the way to go. Chewy and Amazon had the lowest prices, especially on the crate and harnesses. Keep reading to see everything you’ll need and the lowest prices on dog gear.

Once we knew we were getting a dog, we set aside money each week in an envelope. In addition, we also looked for deals and kept a big list of everything we needed.

Life with My 8-Week-Old Vizsla Puppy
vizsla puppy 9 weeks old

How much does a new purebred Vizsla puppy cost?

Our 8-week-old Vizsla puppy was $1,300. The price of a puppy depends on many factors, and it’s specifically hard to gauge if you go the breeder route. Many breeders have comically outdated and simple information on their websites, so you have to contact them to find out about new litters, pricing, and if the breed you want is a good fit for your family.

How much did the first vet visit cost for our puppy?

The first vet visit was much cheaper than I thought it would be – $116.18 for an 8 week old puppy in a generally high cost of living area (north shore of Long Island). Although it was a very short visit, it was still way under what I expected.

Keep reading to see a full breakdown of the cost of each vet visit in the first month!

How many times does a puppy go to the vet?

I brought Bodhi to the vet three times. Once at 8 weeks, 10 weeks, and 13 weeks. Luckily we are done until we take him to get fixed!

Vizsla puppy 10 weeks old

Do you have to bring your puppy to the vet right away?

It’s a good idea to bring your puppy to the vet within the first few days of bringing them home.

See this explanation from Chewy:

But regardless of what the shelter or breeder has already done, it is always a good idea to schedule a new puppy vet visit within a few days of picking up your new canine companion. This will allow the veterinarian to review your pup’s records and quickly provide any overdue care. The doctor will also perform a complete physical examination and perhaps run some laboratory tests to identify any potential health concerns. It’s best to learn about problems as soon as possible before any health guarantees the breeder provides expires.

Chewy, “Puppy’s First Vet Visit: What to Expect, Checklist and Tips“
Vizsla puppy 11 weeks old in grass

Dog Gear

Here are all the things we got for our dog!

Note that we had to upgrade to a bigger collar and harness after a few weeks. We used old towels to line the crate in the beginning.

Crating

Crate (42″ with divider) – $85.80

Dog Gate (with cat door) – $110.00 (note that the price is way cheaper on Amazon – we bought one from our local pet store our of desperation and paid so much more)

Bed/Crate Liner (42″) – $18.55

Eating

Food (Diamond Naturals Extreme Athlete) – $52.84

Treats – $19.99

Food and water bowls – $8.00

Collapsable dog bowl – $5.99

Stainless steel outdoor water bowls (1.25 each at the dollar store!) – $2.50

House Training

Pooper Scooper – $16.25

Nature’s Miracle Pet Odor Remover – $8.99

Dog waste bags – $5.94

Walking

Puppy collar – $14.00

Dog collar – $8.68

Dog tag – $8.64

Puppy leash – $16.00

Leash – $8.99

Spare leash – $11.89

Puppy harness – $16.28

Dog harness – $16.28

Other

Brush – $5.99

Shampoo – $8.68

Clickers (set of 2) – $5.99

Bones – ~$30.00

Misc. Toys – ~30.00

Total = $516.28

Vet Fees

Visit 1 – $116.18

Visit 2 – $120.00

Visit 3 – $197.00

Medication – $24.50

How much vet costs for new puppy

Total = $457.68

I can’t help but think “that’s it?” as I go through all the receipts. Specifically, I had planned on spending double that on immunizations and visits. I love our vet and I’m glad we decided to take a chance and try somewhere new. The vet we used to go to for our cat would be double that and is much further away.

$457.68 seems like a fair price for a healthy puppy!

Miscellaneous

The Actual Dog – $1,300

Hotel – $149 (luckily we had a gift card)

Gas – ~$250 (Remember that week that gas hit like $5 a gallon? That was the week we had to drive 8 hours to pickup our dog.)

Misc. Travel Expenses (food, coffee, etc.) ~ $70 (also used mainly gift cards)

Total = ~ $1,769

How Much Does a Puppy Cost in the First Month?

Total = $2,742.96!


I think that if this list needed to be paired down you could find a lot of stuff secondhand, like the crate and gates, if you need them. There were a lot of crates on Craigslist, but couldn’t snag one in time. I know that not everyone picks up after their dog and or chooses to use a crate, and some people just use “human food” for treats.

Food bowls and beds are another thing that can be found around the house. Our Vizsla prefers to sit in our laps anyways.

If you’re lucky, you also won’t need to drive 16 hours with $5 gas prices to pick up your pup!

Vizsla puppy 13 weeks old

Americans are Spending More Money on Their Pets

Americans are spending more and more money on their pets. We truly treat our animals like members of our families. From medical care to bougie doggy day cares, we spare no expense when it comes to our furry friends.

That has been even more apparent amid the pandemic as people work from home and recognize their animals’ need for stimulation.

“The American Pet Products Association projects Americans will spend a record-high $99 billion this year on all things pet, ranging from food to veterinary care. Online pet food sales jumped 77% in the U.S. in March 2020 YOY. Pet merchandise is expected to be one of the top gift-giving categories, according to a survey by consulting firm Deloitte. On average, half of those surveyed plan to spend $90 on pet items.”

MSNBC

So, it’s easy to get caught up in thinking you need all the latest gear and accessories for your new puppy. When you stick to the essentials, having a dog can be very affordable!


Did you get a puppy or an older dog?

Did you have an idea of how much a new puppy would cost?

Let me know below!

O.

More from Leaf and Steel:
  • The Best Dog Books for Babies and Toddlers
  • 5 Reasons We Chose a Vizsla as Our Family Dog
  • Mother’s Day Guide for the Tired Mama in Your Life
  • Life with My 8-Week-Old Vizsla Puppy

If you are interested in guest posting on Leaf and Steel, please check out our Guest Post page for guidelines!

Filed in: Uncategorized • by Olivia • 5 Comments

Gift Guide for the Tired Mama in Your Life

April 27, 2022

Mother’s Day is just around the corner! I’ve gathered some of the most sought-after and special gifts to celebrate. These would also make excellent baby shower gifts, as well as amazing sip-and-see gifts! Hey, they’d even be easy new-mom presents.

If you’re a mom or have spent more than four minutes around a mom then you know that we are perpetually tired. Always. It does not matter if the baby slept through the night or not. it doesn’t matter how much sleep we get. There’s just something about mothering that is infallibly exhausting.

I didn’t realize what a currency sleep was until I had a child. There’s an endless list of things I would trade for a solid 8 hours of sleep. Sleep is everything.

These days, my little one is usually sleeping through the night. But, I still have to deal with my own revenge bedtime procrastination, the mental load, and my own hobbies and needs.

Some of the links in the post are affiliate links, which means I may make a small commission, at no cost to you.

I’ve gathered a few of the best Mother’s Day gifts for the tired mom in your life!

10 Quotes about Motherhood

Ice Roller Face Massager

This one is my personal favorite. It felt so good on my face after being up all night with my baby. It’s never too cold and the large size makes it quick and easy to glide across the entire face as often as you need. – $17.99 from Walmart

Barefoot Dreams CozyChic Ultra Lite Long Robe

Ah yes, the obligatory Mother’s Day robe suggestion. There’s a reason you’ll always see robes on Mother’s Day gift guides: they’re practical, they’re comfortable, and they always fit.

This one from Barefoot Dreams is incredibly soft, lightweight, and machine washable. – $148 from Nordstrom

Vegan 24K Gold Eye Patches

A great way to restore tired eyes! These patches improve the look of fine lines and wrinkles. Store them in the fridge for extra relief. They can be used before bed or in the morning. Pair with the ice roller above for a refreshed and relaxed face. – $29.38 on Walmart

Stanley 24 oz Insulated Mug (in the color Blush)

This Stanley insulated mug has a cult following for a reason! “The double-wall insulation keeps your favorite beverage cold for up to 12 hours or iced for up to 40 hours. Unlike normal mugs, this is manufactured using 18/8 stainless steel, meaning it can take a beating.” The bottle is BPA free and has a wide mouth. – $19.82 from Walmart

CozyChic Throw Blanket from Barefoot Dreams

This ultra soft Barefoot Dreams blanket is nothing but dreamy. It’ll be easy for the tired mama in your life to sleep when the baby sleeps with this darling blanket. We share everything with our kids – a luxurious, mama-only blanket is a special treat for a tired mom. 54″x72″ and machine washable. – $147 from Nordstrom

Aromascape Asleep (Lavender & Eucalyptus) 3 Wick Scented Candle

A wonderful way to relax on Mother’s Day is with calming scents and warm light. This 3 wick lavender and eucalyptus candle is sure to help everyone wind down at the end of a long day. Pair with the pajamas below for the start of a relaxing bedtime routine. – $11.99 from Walmart

Essenza Mini Pure White Bundle from Nespresso

The most compact and affordable luxury espresso maker yet! This small Nespresso machine fits onto any counter and is sure to delight any coffee lover. Pair with a mom themed mug and premium coffee! – $219 from Nespresso

SKIMS Rib Pajamas (shown in Heather Gray)

Every mom needs a set of remarkably comfortable pajamas. SKIMS pajamas are high-rise with the perfect amount of stretch. I love the button down front and simple silhouette. They have so many fun colors to chose from! – $118 from Nordstrom

HATCH Rest Mini Sound Machine

Now, hear me out: I know sound machines are usually for the baby – but did you know they can help adults too? This Mother’s Day, let mom sleep in without the chaos on the other side of her bedroom door sounding through…It comes with eight different sounds: white noise, heartbeat, water, dryer, ocean, wind, rain, and birds. Control it all from your iPhone or Android. You can control the timer, dimer, sounds, volume, etc. – $40 from Saks Fifth Avenue


Are you celebrated on Mother’s Day?

Are you a tired mom who would love to receive something on this list?

Let me know below!

O.

More from Leaf and Steel:
  • Life with My 8-Week-Old Vizsla Puppy
  • How to Take Care of Your Baby When You’re Sick
  • Little Things I Do To Make my Baby Feel Loved
  • My Baby Knows What She Needs
  • How I Get Over Writer’s Block

If you are interested in guest posting on Leaf and Steel, please check out our Guest Post page for guidelines!

Filed in: Uncategorized • by Olivia • 8 Comments

Guest Post: Keeping the Focus on You

April 25, 2022

Today’s post is a Guest Post by Ashley Lopez of Ashley Spills! Be sure to check her out on Instagram, Pinterest, and Facebook later!

Hello Leaf and Steel readers! My name is Ashley and my blog is Ashley Spills. I am 27 years old and I am from San Diego, California. I connected with Olivia on WordPress and have been following her blog for a few months now. Though I am not a mother, I find myself attracted to her posts about motherhood because I hope to be one soon(ish).

In my blog, I write about all things self. So, self-awareness, self-love, self-care, self-improvement, self-discipline, and more. I write reflective pieces that at times may seem random, but all of them lead to a deeper connection to self and introspection—something we should all strive for. While I’m unpacking the essentials of me and my life by writing thoughtful think pieces, I encourage my audience to do the same.

I used to float through life unaware and the journey was daunting. Over the past two years, I have come to realize and understand so many things about myself. At times, we live life without taking a second to sit back and reflect on our day because we are so busy. As we get older, we feel as if time is going by so much faster than it was when we were younger. That is not the case.  As adults, our lives tend to be a bit more repetitive, so it feels like we are checking things off of a list all the time. Work, check. Dinner, check. Clean, check. Wash my face, check.

Where is the fun in all of that? Well, that’s what I’m on a mission to find. A way to make life feel fulfilled while understanding the small corks that make me me. 

Some of my beliefs 

I believe reflecting on your day, week, month, and year is a great way to slow down to see what you can improve on and recognize what is working for you. For example, noticing things that give you a positive attitude and make you feel empowered (exercise, self-care activities, reading, hobbies, etc.) are things you should aim to do at least 15 minutes a day.

I also think it’s possible to reach self-discovery by spending time alone; Expressing yourself through art; Finding your triggers that lead to negative behavior; And appreciating what makes you mad, happy, sad, excited, or scared. Acknowledging, doing, and understanding all these things will lead to self-awareness.

Why I think self-awareness is important for motherhood

As mentioned previously, I am not a mother, but I do hope to be one. I long for the feeling of pregnancy, giving birth, and parenting. I want to feel a love that’s so pure, it can’t be broken—or explained. My journey toward self-awareness hasn’t been easy, but I am proud to say I know (mostly) what I like, what I don’t like, what triggers me, and more and the why behind it. I know that motherhood is going to be a whole new world. Everything that comes with it is going to be bizarre and probably weird at first. I also probably won’t know anything about myself at all when I become a mother and I’ll have to start this ride to self-awareness all over again.  

Everything I am learning now will most likely be thrown out the window, but that’s okay. I am hoping that I will still have pieces of me and some mental clarity in my life. When I am a mother, I want to know how to take care of myself, mentally and physically, so I can transfer some of my energy to the little human I will be molding. 

The more you know about yourself

The more you get to know yourself, the better you’ll be able to handle your reactions, accept what is, and move forward. If you’re interested in unraveling your thoughts and better understanding yourself, check out my blog and we’ll face our truest-selves together. The journey to self-awareness is one you don’t want to miss because every day gives you a chance to learn more about yourself. I promise: You are worth it.

Thanks for reading, xo.

Below are links to my blog, my Facebook page, my Instagram, and my Pinterest:

Ashley Spills Blog

Ashley Spills Facebook

Ashley Spills Instagram

Ashley Spills Pinterest


Thank you Ashley!

If you would like to guest post on Leaf and Steel, head to our Guest Post page!


What did you think of this post?

How do you keep the focus on yourself?

Let us know below!

O.

More from Leaf and Steel:
  • 15 Spring Farmhouse Decor Items Under $15
  • Doll Accessories with Madame Alexander
  • Lessons from Stay-at-Home Moms
  • Guest Post: How to Be a More Self-Confident Mother and Enhance Your Life

Filed in: Guest Posts, Uncategorized • by Olivia • 2 Comments

Doll Accessories with Madame Alexander

April 25, 2022

We love our stroller from Madame Alexander!

Madame Alexander was so kind to gift us Lily, Baby M’s first and favorite baby doll!

Now, we have the perfect matching stroller.

If you’d like to read more about dolls and play, check out my post “Why Your Child Needs a Doll with Madame Alexander“.

Click here to see more accessories from Madame Alexander!

#gifted

More from Leaf and Steel:
  • My End of Summer Bucket List for Baby!
  • How to Take Care of Your Baby When You’re Sick
  • How to Survive Your 1-Year-Old’s First Blood Test
  • How to Build a Portable Breastfeeding Bin

Filed in: Uncategorized • by Olivia • Leave a Comment

My Baby Knows What She Needs

April 24, 2022

Ah, let me just grab my megaphone and get onto my soapbox.

*I feel very strongly about this*

I will be screaming all of this into the void for the rest of my life.

Let’s begin.


My baby knows what she needs and it’s my job to listen to her and respect her.

I don’t know how we are in a place where “gentle parenting” even has a name and isn’t just called “parenting yet”. There shouldn’t really be another option, right? Either way, I’m happy society is moving in the right direction.

My daughter has a voice. She’s had a voice since she was in the womb. She would respond to different stimuli- cold water, Chipotle, light. Even before she was “here”, she’s been communicating with me.

My partner and I talked (and continue to talk) about how important it is for our daughter to understand consent and to know that her voice is hers.

I am not in her body, I don’t know what she needs. So, when she wakes up crying at 3 am for the eighth night in a row because she needs a sip of water – I’m not going to deny her water.

If she is rubbing her eyes an hour before her usual nap time, I put her to bed a little earlier. If she takes a few bites of her dinner and says “done”, then I believe that she’s done.

It’s these small moments that show her that I am listening and that I believe her.

Here are some ways we listen to our child.

  • let her finish eating
  • let her have more food
  • let her nap when she’s tired
  • respect her when she says “no” to a hug, kiss, etc.
  • she doesn’t have to hug or be held by anyone if she doesn’t want to

That last one can be a little tricky, especially with family. Although she adores all of her family members, she doesn’t have to hug or be held by them if she doesn’t want to.

We are so grateful that our families respect her boundaries listen to her voice.

When we stop responding to our babies in the middle of the night, tell them they need to eat when they aren’t hungry, tell them they are “fine” when they tell us they feel sick, we are teaching them to go against their gut.


My baby has a gut. It’s hers. She has intuition. Kids are like dogs, they pickup on things adults do not. It’s my job as a parent to protect her gut and listen to her, to teach her how to use it.

Here are some things we do to keep her intuition intact:

  • help her know the difference between a secret and a surprise
  • tell her the difference between safe and unsafe touching
  • tell her who to go to if she needs help
  • remind her that mommy and daddy will always keep her safe
  • remind her that there’s nothing she can do to make us stop loving her

I cannot wait for social media rules regarding parents and kids. I can’t wait for Instagram Coogan accounts.

I have this blog, I have social media. And I have a strict code of ethics when it comes to posting about my kid.

For the love of God, please stop posting bath pics. Stop telling strangers on the internet about potty training. Stop posting embarrassing videos, personal information, or school details.

Your child is a human being who ALREADY has thoughts and feelings.

Here are some of the ways we protect our child’s privacy:

  • respecting when she doesn’t want her picture taken
  • vigorously reviewing everything we post about her, including pictures
  • not disclosing her medical information
  • changing her privately rather than in front of people
  • asking others to respect our wishes as far as posting pictures and information about her

I could go on and on.

I think it’s really important for all of us to take time every so often to reflect on the fact that kids are just smaller adults.

It’s important to review safety protocols and define respect for your family.


What are your thoughts?

What do you feel strongly about as a parent?
Let me know below.

O.

More from Leaf and Steel:
  • 5 Free Indoor Places to Go with Baby
  • Little Things I Do To Make my Baby Feel Loved
  • Lessons from Stay-at-Home Moms
  • 5 Reasons We Chose a Vizsla as Our Family Dog

Filed in: Uncategorized • by Olivia • 8 Comments

Guest Post: How to Be a More Self-Confident Mother and Enhance Your Life

April 20, 2022

Today’s post is a guest post by Katie Conroy from advicemine.com. If you are interested in guest posting on Leaf and Steel, head over here!

How to Be a More Self-Confident Mother and Enhance Your Life

Nobody said being a mom was easy. Motherhood is a big responsibility and comes with many expectations, both within and without. It can be daunting, and often overwhelming. How do you take care of someone else when looking after yourself is often a struggle? The answer is by being self-confident! 

When you’re self-confident, you’re powerful. When you’re powerful, you can move mountains – or at least take care of your family and just live life better. Finding some extra self-confidence will go a long way toward making your journey as a mom smoother and more enjoyable. Today, Leaf and Steel offers some tested-and-true advice on becoming a more self-confident person (and mother):      

Praise Yourself

When was the last time you said or admitted something good about yourself? Appreciating yourself for everything you do, big and small, is a necessary first step in feeling good about yourself. And when you feel good about yourself, you’re more confident in who you are – which in turn makes doing new things easier. See the self-perpetuating cycle here?

Practice praising yourself for how far you’ve come, how much you’ve achieved, and how well you take care of your loved ones. It’s how you’ll slowly and surely build up your self-confidence levels, says Mindvalley. It’s also a great way to improve the overall positivity of your household.

Be Okay with Being Judged

Being a mother opens you up to many judgments, as you’re doubtless aware. Everyone has an opinion on how you should raise your kids, and how well you’re doing. Not everyone will see your challenges and the sacrifices you make. The criticisms will flow, essentially, and praise may be non-existent – and that’s okay. Realize that the way people treat you says more about them than it does about you.

Learn to read people’s intentions instead of taking their words at face value. Be at peace with how you’re doing as a parent (and otherwise) – that’s what really matters. 

Change Up Your Friend Circle

Do the people around you push you down or pull you up? As Sigmund Freud put it, “Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, make sure you are not just surrounded by idiots”. The people around you have a massive impact on your self-confidence, beliefs, and ways of being. If they’re supportive, caring, and kind, it’s easier to be comfortable in your own skin and be more self-confident. If they’re toxic or manipulative, they’re going to thrive on you being weak (not confident), and be invested in pulling you down. Set strong boundaries for existing relationships, and find better people, if necessary.

Go in a Different Career Direction

The work you do is an important part of your identity. Performing your job well and making a difference in other people’s lives, in whatever fashion, can help you gain self-respect. If you feel your career isn’t where it should be, or you’re concerned about balancing your current career with your family life, don’t hesitate to go back to school to enhance your prospects. For instance, an online degree in business could help you gain business acumen – whether your program of choice is business management, management and leadership, or marketing – and just become a more capable person overall.

Groom and Dress Well

Appearances matter. The way you look affects the way other people perceive you and treat you. More importantly, the way you look also affects how you perceive and treat yourself. By dressing well, visiting the spa, and taking care of your body and hair, you’re going to look and feel prettier. Don’t be afraid of indulging yourself every once in a while. If you make grooming a habit, you’ll quickly witness an increase in your self-confidence levels.

Take Care of Your Body

Your body, along with your mind and emotions, is one of the pillars of your existence. You must look after it well to keep it beautiful and healthy. When your body is in good shape, you have plenty of energy, feel more capable, and can do more. If you don’t look after your body enough, you are going to feel down, drained, and incapable. Start a fitness routine, eat healthier, and do your best to fulfill your body’s needs to be more self-confident.

Allow Failure to Teach You 

Success is at the end of the road riddled with failures. Don’t let your failures destroy your self-confidence. Society often conditions us to feel bad about our mistakes, with guilt and self-criticism becoming our constant companions. It’s important to understand that making mistakes is being human. No one is perfect, and you don’t learn to walk without falling down a few times. In fact, falling is intrinsic to understanding how to not fall. Mistakes teach you what not to do next time. They’re priming you for success if you let them. 

Trust Yourself

When you trust, you’re confident in something or someone. You trust the ground to be solid, water to be wet, and probably your parents to care about you – but do you trust yourself? Trust is intrinsic to confidence. Most people trust themselves in some ways, but not others. You probably trust yourself to get out of bed without assistance, for example, but do you trust yourself to return a million dollars you found lying on the ground?

The answer, for most people, is maybe! You should choose to trust yourself to return the money (or not. Hey, it’s a million dollars, we make no judgments here). The key part is choosing to trust yourself to do or be a certain way. If you aren’t there yet, trust that you’re still learning how, and you will get there in time. You have to crawl before you can walk. Trust the process, and do attempt.

Confidence takes time to build up. It’s tied to how you feel and think about yourself – and changing your mindset isn’t something that will happen overnight. Be persistent, set short-term and long-term goals, and learn how to be there for yourself while you make changes (big or small). You will, eventually, get there – and you will be able to teach your kids to be the same way. It helps everyone, so don’t hesitate to invest in yourself.


Katie Conroy enjoys writing and created advicemine.com where she shares advice from her experiences, education & research. She particularly enjoys writing about lifestyle topics and created the website to share advice she has learned through experience, education and research.

You can find Katie at advicemine.com, or shoot her an email at info@advicemine.com !


Thank you, Katie, for your article!

For more information on guest posting on Leaf and Steel, click here!


What do you do to build confidence as a parent?

Let us know below!

O.

More from Leaf and Steel:
  • How to Take Care of Your Baby When You’re Sick
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  • 27 Lessons in 27 Years
  • Lessons from Stay-at-Home Moms

Filed in: Guest Posts, Uncategorized • by Olivia • 1 Comment

Baby Books to Celebrate Moms Everywhere

April 19, 2022

Mother’s Day is almost here! What better way to share your love of mom with your little one than by reading books on the subject!

Keep reading to see ten of the best baby books to celebrate any mom in 2022.

This post contains affiliate links. This means that I may make a small commission off of products that are purchased through these links, at no cost to you. You can read more about this process here.

I don’t know about you, but we have books strewn all over our house. They’re everywhere. There are books for the bathtub, books for the stroller, books for grandparents’ houses and books for the car….

our first little book pile for Baby M

“Can you read your book while you wait” is an everyday phrase in our house. My daughter has been a voracious reader since the beginning. I love how much she loves to read! I credit our dedication to reading every day since birth (okay, not every day, I’m human).

In my experience, reading and motherhood go hand in hand!

There’s nothing sweeter than having my daughter crawl into my lap with her favorite book. As much as I love our snuggles during Puffin Rock or Elmo, reading a great children’s book with her is a joy like no other.

When is Mother’s Day this year?

Mother’s Day is on Sunday, May 8th, 2022. Mother’s Day is held on the second Sunday in May in the United States.

When should I start reading to my baby?

As soon as possible! Even if it’s a quick little board book in the beginning, get into the habit of reading to your baby immediately. I remember adding it onto my list of things to do when I had a newborn.

Read with your child every single day.

nothings more awkward than reading to a stranger in water who steals all your nutrients

See this article from Parents for more information: “The Benefits of Reading to Your Newborn” (click here for reference):

Studies have also shown that children who were read to as newborns have a larger vocabulary, as well as more advanced mathematical skills, than other kids their age. A 2019 study published in the Journal of Developmental & Behavioral Pediatrics, for example, found that kids who are read to every day are exposed to around 78,000 words each year—over five years, that adds up to 1.4 million words heard during story time.

There’s also a direct link between how many words a baby hears each day and her language skills. One study found that babies whose parents spoke to them a lot scored higher on standard tests when they reached age 3 than children whose parents weren’t as verbal.

Parents, “The Benefits of Reading to Your Newborn”

How do I read to my baby more?

I always say that the easiest way to read more books to your little one is to tack it onto an already formed routine. Reading before bedtime, around a mealtime, or after a nap are some of the best times to read with your baby.

Baby M loves to read by herself when I’m making her meals or in the car! By having lots of books in lots of places, it’s easy to keep your little one reading.

What are the best books about moms for babies?

I’ve compiled a list of some classics and newer titles.

My personal favorite is The Runaway Bunny by Margaret Wise Brown. I fell apart the first time I read it. There was something so sweet and comforting about the mama bunny accepting the baby bunny’s rebellion.

The illustrations by Clement Hurd are vibrant and iconic. I would love to hang some prints from this book in my next nursery.

miss my bump

I was encouraged (by the internet) to read to my baby while I was pregnant, that she would be comforted by the sound of my voice. The Runaway Bunny was always my go-to pregnancy read. Of course, I fully expected my infant daughter to have some kind of reaction to me reading the book when she was out. She made it very clear that the book was not her cup of tea…

My goal as a parent is to be “the tree” that my daughter can come home to.

Baby Books to Celebrate Moms Everywhere

The Runaway Bunny, Margaret Wise Brown

I Love Mom with The Very Hungry Caterpillar, Eric Carle

Is Your Mama a Llama?, Deborah Guarino

Are You My Mother?, P.D. Eastman

I Love You, Mommy, Jillian Harker

The Invisible String, Patrice Karst

My Mom Loves Me!, Marianne Richmond

Why a Son Needs a Mom, Gregory E. Lang

Why a Daughter Needs a Mom, Gregory E. Lang

A Mother for Choco, Kelko Kasza


So, there are some of the best books to help your little one celebrate mother’s day this year!

Are you familiar with any of the books above? Have you read The Runaway Bunny?

How do you plan on celebrating the moms in your life this year?

Let me know below!

O.

More from Leaf and Steel:
  • Easter Traditions to Start with Your Baby or Toddler
  • How I Get Over Writer’s Block
  • How to Create a Home Learning Corner for Your One-Year-Old
  • Lessons from Stay-at-Home Moms
  • How to Take Care of Your Baby When You’re Sick

If you are interested in guest posting on Leaf and Steel, please check out our Guest Post page for guidelines!

Filed in: Favorite Things, Uncategorized • by Olivia • Leave a Comment

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