I Hate Mother’s Day

I just do. This is my second one. It’s not for me, I’m sorry. I hate Mother’s Day.

Let me be clear that I have a great relationship with my mother, as well as my mother-in-law. I am a mother.

And now, I absolutely can’t stand Mother’s Day.

I’ve had a handful of moments of “oh, wow, I really am a mom now”.

Here are some that stick out to me:

  • Viewing the idea of a new pet as “just another thing for me to clean up after”
  • Bones I didn’t even know I had creaking when I walk
  • Premature forehead wrinkles
  • Premature grey hair
  • Spastically hitting the OFF button on the radio when a song said the word “sex” when my daughter was in the car

You know the deal.

You know how I really know I’m a mom?

I just want to be left alone on Mother’s Day.

I want to kiss my daughter and my husband goodbye and check into a hotel with my laptop and a book and Chipotle. I don’t want to have to walk the dog or put on real clothes or answer to anyone.

What I want the most for Mother’s Day is to be completely absolved of my responsibilities.

The more I’m here on earth the more I’m realizing that the core principle, the central theme of motherhood has always been and will always be, sacrifice.

New, tangible examples of this reveal themselves to me as time goes on.

I know that there are people who don’t have their moms, people with shitty moms, people longing to be moms or moms who wish that they could spend the day with their kids who aren’t here anymore. I acknowledge that I’m coming from a place of entitled privilege. I am deeply lucky.

So, cheers to the alternate universe version of me thats sitting on a beach somewhere, reading and writing and thinking about something other than meal plans and shopping lists and stewing in self-pity.

I’m not sure how to end this post. Maybe I’ll feel differently next year.

O.

21 Comments

  1. Take the day off! Go out for lunch and go shopping or sit at the park or beach. I used to feel the same way until I was clear with what I wanted on Mother’s Day. Hopefully you get spoiled and have a great Mother’s Day. ❤️

  2. Girl, you are not alone. I can’t stand Mother’s Day as a mother – the only thing I like about it is focusing on my own mom. It’s just one more day that The World blows up with marketing unrealistic expectations – in reality it’s just one more day for me of dealing with some sort of teenage crisis 🙄 You’re right about motherhood being sacrifice. It’s like a post I read about marriage a long time ago: motherhood isn’t about you. It’s about everybody BUT you. Hang in there mama (and hopefully at least eat something you like, even if you have to hide in the pantry to do it 😁)

    1. Thank you for your comment. Wow, I really identify with the part about motherhood being about everyone else. I’m going to celebrate this weekend instead!

  3. Thank you for this! I feel the same too so I booked in a spa on Mother’s Day. Here’s the kicker: before I could even sit on the couch when I got home, dear husband was telling me how my little one wouldn’t go down for a nap; which was unusual. Turns out HE FORGOT TO FEED HIM LUNCH 😂😵 no wonder he wouldn’t nap. I guess the takeaway was: I still got my pamper time, and shit will happen. Just gotta let go.

  4. I spent mother’s day reflecting on my mom’s legacy. She didn’t celebrate mother’s day either. We knew better than to bother her with more work or appliances related to more work. Mother’s day was the day to celebrate the woman she was. A day to do what she wanted to do. As (young) adults we took care of ourselves. She was a happier woman and we were happy for her.

  5. I thoroughly enjoyed this and I’m not a mom. I also hate the holiday, it seems so forced and unnecessary. Give moms a break and let them just BE.

  6. Wow, a very honest post. I am sure all mommy’s feel this but I pray that all moms find their peace and that gratitude rather be the attitude of the day while you are sacrificing yourselves. Always trying to act out of love instead of duty, it’s real hard most days but I can promise one thing, if you have Jesus you can do all things, He gives you the strength.

  7. It’s okay to feel that way..just because your a mom doesn’t mean you have to think a certain way. I felt that way when my kids were little, and required so much. Now? I’m just a single mom with teens which require a different type of presence.

  8. That doesn’t mean you hate Mother’s Day, lol. It just means that’s what you have to tell them that’s what you want. Very specifically. My first few sucked, but I’ve got it down pretty good now. We do a little morning family thing, then my husband and son LEAVE. lol. I value my quiet time, and I don’t get a lot of it, so I consider that a great gift. Well that, plus I told him to get my oil changed and car detailed. I have a thing for useful gifts, lol.

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