2019 has been the weirdest, longest year of my life. Let me explain.
In January I fractured my wrist and endured getting a plate and 8 screws in to fix the problem. I will never take the use of both hands for granted again. Also, I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to snowboard with the same fearlessness that I once had, but I’ll work on it.
Several of my friends lost family members over the winter. When someone goes through something painful, we all feel it. Carrying the weight of others during hardship is a blessing of being part of a community.
Spring brought a new full time job that I loved.
Summer brought a promotion that I am, well, still getting used to. Going from reselling and working from home, to working part time at a preschool, to being a full-time head teacher
was is a shock to my system. It’s been a struggle, but I’m learning loads.
The fall was overshadowed by a chemical pregnancy and a sadness that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. A constricting, impenetrable hopelessness that wraps you up in madness.
But, when I go through something, I get carried by those around me. Thank goodness for good women.
And so, we enter winter.
A little wiser and hopefully a little more humble. I find myself looking at the clock less. These days I don’t feel like I’m doing the next thing just to move onto the next thing.
I’ve been in this odd place of calm. A place of trust. I know that God is putting everything in it’s place, even when I can’t see that.
I am ending 2019 with a great deal of gathered evidence that it always works out. The bills always seem to get paid and no one will suffer if the laundry doesn’t get put into the dryer today.
I hope in 2020 to take better care of my health, like finally using the gym membership I’ve been paying for. I hope to do more work on here.
I would love to change my life this year, or invite the universe to help me. I want to look back and say that things are different in the best way.
I hope the same for you.
What are your reflections on 2019, or the decade in general?
What are your hopes for yourself in the New Year?