The past few weeks have been rough. I get kind of deflated or exhausted after the holidays. All that pressure and running around to prepare. I had a great holiday season, but I’ve definitely been hit by the January blues. We’ve already had a blizzard and two other storms here on Long Island, and are due for more snow later in the week. Most years, we are just starting to get snow this time of year. It definitely takes a toll on my mental health.
I’ve been on the defense. I’ve upped my water intake, scheduled social events and I’m starting to talk about it. I haven’t felt seasonal depression in years, so there’s this kind of shame around it, like I failed. I know in my heart of hearts this isn’t true. I know this is my brain chemistry, and this is normal, and I know that so many people around get depressed this time of year.
So, despite all of this, today is a good day. I know my feelings will pass and I’ll feel more energy, passion, etc. soon. This is just a season of life, and it’s temporary. I still have my love for the world. I still want to be a part of this world. And that, in itself, is a miracle. A few years ago it wasn’t like this. The ability to have and to recognize hope is a gift, one that I’m blessed to hold.